The Runaway
by Cha-Cha
Summary: When Sirius ran away from home, he instantly went to his best friend, James Potters house. There, he found unconditional love and understanding, secrets he never expected from james' past well as a loving family. James and Sirius friendship.
1. Chapter 1

Author: Cha-Cha 

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the show so please don't sue.**

**Warning: Talk of child abuse.**

Stripping down to his boxers, James crawled under the duvet on his bed, blowing out the candle on the table next to him before settling down to go to sleep. He had just closed his eyes when the loud gong of the doorbell reverberated around the large mansion, waking up its inhabitants. Not bothering to dress, James followed his father down the winding stairs, and hung back slightly by the wall as his father opened the door, only to suddenly rush forward as he realised it was Sirius Black, his best friend.

The normally cheerful boy looked close to tears while the cold rain water trickled down his face and shoulder length black hair, sinking into his clothing, and causing the bedraggled boy to shiver as the cold settled into his bones.

'Sirius!' Harold Potter exclaimed before James could, 'quickly, come inside, we need to get you warm and dry.' He commanded, pulling the dark haired boy inside and allowing James to guide him to the kitchen while the older Potter took the trunk that Sirius had brought and pulled it inside before banishing it to James' bedroom.

'Who was it dear?' Anna Potter called down as she stood at the top of the stairs, her hands shaking as the normally do. She seemed small and fragile as she stood there, dressed only in a night robe. Her pale brown hair seemed almost blonde in the dim lighting blending into her pale face.

Harold was quite different with a deeper olive skin and black hair that, like James', seemed to stick up in random directions while his hazel eyes were framed by a pair of thin wired glasses.

'It's Sirius, he's run away, and this time I think permanently.' Harold answered knowing she wouldn't go back to bed until she had found out everything. Anna gave a sad smile before drifting away upstairs, only to return a few seconds later with a pile of blankets clutched in her trembling hands, but Harold knew better than to try and take them from her, she'd only tell him she can manage; she isn't weak or helpless. It always brings a smile to his face to see the fire in his wife.

The two of them enter the kitchen to see James trying to apply pressure to some of the bleeding cuts on his friend's body, whose wet shirt is now lying crumpled on the table, but only being able to attend to one at a time. Taking his wand, Harold dried Sirius off before applying heating charms to the blankets which James wrapped around him.

Anna took out a saucepan and began to pour a large amount of hot chocolate into it with her son's help while Harold used his skills as a Healer to get rid of the scratches as well as bruises and broken bones before allowing on to put back on his now dried tee-shirt. Sirius looks at him gratefully before finally allowing the tears to fall. Harold wrapped his arms around the shaking boy and held him, allowing all Sirius was feeling to come out while James came and sat next to the two of them, allowing his own tears to fall at what had happened to his friend while wrapping his own arms around Sirius' waist and buried his head in Padfoot's shoulder, not minding that his glasses were digging into his face, and causing Sirius to relax even more and accept the support he was being given.

Eventually though, the tears ran out, but no one was ready to let go just yet until Sirius finally pulled back, scrubbing at his wet face, noticing that James was doing the same next to him, although more discreetly as he turned slightly away.

'James sweetheart, could you bring over the drinks please,' Anna requested, breaking the silence that had descended heavily on the room. Her hands seemed to be shaking more than usual as she picked up her own half filled mug of hot chocolate and sat down across from the beaten boy, around the circular table. James did as his mother asked, after the first accident where she had burnt herself with boiling water, his father had banned her from carrying hot drinks that were filled, restricting her to half mugs of hot drinks, and either him or his father carrying the full ones.

Setting the mugs down on the table, each of them took one and accepted the warmth that filled them from the drink, allowing Sirius to talk in his own time.

'I ran away.' Sirius stated after a few minutes of staring into his drink, unable to look anyone in the face. 'He was after me all holiday; taking out everything on me whether I did something or not, he just didn't stop beating me, starving me on occasions. Even the bloody house elf did it.' His voice cracked at the end of his sentence as he tried to keep back the hysterical laughter at this. James placed a hand on Sirius shoulder, giving him a look that suggested he understood what he was talking about, a notion he quickly pushed away, after all, James had a perfect home life, how could he possible understand what it was like to be beaten and abused by his own family?

'Sirius, we've always considered you our son, even from the first day we met you; we have. We'd love it if you lived with us, permanently and not just for the holidays.' Harold told the boy seriously, sharing a smile with Anna and James, who nodded in agreement. Sirius looked at them in shock.

'You really mean it?' He asked as though he had barely realised he'd spoken.

'Of course sweetie, you're my baby, even if you were taken by those other people.' Anna answered. Sirius smiled, he'd always gotten along well with James' parents no matter how different they both were. Anna was always most caring with him, treating him just like James while being quite a quiet figure, as though one gust of wind could blow her over and yet often showed hidden depths. Harold on the other hand was more confident but was equally as kind and generous, and very often seemed to be able to read peoples minds as he knew exactly what they were planning or thinking, sometimes even before they did themselves.

'Thank you, thank you so much.' Sirius' words rushed out before he hugged both of them tightly, James smiled at how well they were accepting his friend and at the same time glad Sirius finally was going to get the love he needed and deserved.

'I think both of you need to rest now, it's late and it has been very stressful and tiring for you especially Sirius,' Harold told the two boys after catching each of them yawning multiple times. Neither looked to be about to protest.

'C'mon Siri, you can sleep in my room,' James offered as he took all of the empty mugs and placed them in the sink before Harold used wand to clean them and put them away. As his mothers magic was often erratic, her husband had eventually convinced her only to use it for emergencies, not that Sirius knew this, since most spells seemed to go wrong for her as she couldn't get the correct motion from her wand with her hands.

The two of them stumbled to the stairs, exhausted by the day and struggling to keep awake. Following James' example earlier that night, Sirius stripped down to his boxers and crawled into James' bed, a tradition the two of them had kept up since the first summer Sirius had stayed over. Neither wanting to put in the effort of putting up another bed, they'd shard a bed that night before the next night when Harold transfigured James' bed into two, the tradition had stuck, and Sirius was glad for it, knowing his friend would be able to wake him from any nightmares that may plague him.

They were just about to blow out the candle when the door of James' room creaked open; revealing James' father looking in. He crossed the room and sat on the edge of the bed, next to James who was nearest the door.

'I know you two probably think you are far too old for this, but if you have any problems tonight, any nightmares or just want to know we're here, wake us. We won't mind, just come to our bed, and I do mean for any reason, okay?' Sirius looked amazed at the offer, which brought fresh tears to his eyes. His parents had never done anything like that for him, if he'd had a nightmare, he had been firmly told it wasn't the Black way to complain about it and so he was on his own. So choked up, he could only nod in understanding.

'Sure Dad, we will; promise.' James answered.

'Good,' Harold stood up once more and kissed each of the boys on the forehead and ruffling their hair before wishing them a goodnight, blowing out the candle and leaving the room, quietly closing the door behind him.

'I...I...' Sirius tried to start but just couldn't think of the words to say.

'I know,' James nodded, a small but sad smile danced on his lips as he rolled over to face his friend. 'I couldn't believe it when he first told that to me, I think I was sobbing when he did though.' Before Sirius could ask what he was talking about, after all, Harold was James' father, surely he grew up with that offer; James was asleep. Following his friends example, Sirius eventually drifted off to surprising calm sleep for most of the night. Unfortunately James' sleep wasn't nearly so restful.

Sitting up sharply, the scruffy haired boy gulped in air, the sweat on his body causing him to shiver as the duvet slipped off him and pooled in his lap. He dug the heel of his hands into his eyes in an attempt to hold back the tears before reaching over and grabbing his glasses. Putting them on, he sighed when he saw it was three in the morning, far too early to be up, he was just fortunate he hadn't woken Sirius up with his nightmare. Slipping out of bed, he decided to take his fathers offer up.

He crept silently into his parents' room and shook his father, who after waking up, didn't look particularly surprised to see James there. He put a finger to his lips to motion he should remain quiet before taking a blanket that had been lying on the floor and took his son outside the room and slightly down the hallway so they were nearer to James' room before sitting down and placing the blanket over both of them.

'I had a nightmare.' James stated quietly, Harold nodded in understanding before wrapping an arm around the 15 year old.

'I thought you might.'

'I can't remember if it was real or not, but it felt it. It was Him and he was doing the usual and stuff, I just…' he trailed off. It wasn't the first time he'd had a nightmare like that, he was sure his father must have heard all the different variations of nightmares it could produce over the years, but this one had shaken him more than normal.

'I think what's happened with Sirius may bring back some of the worse memories, what happened to him was just too close to home.' Harold reassured the boy, holding him tighter. He hated the way the nightmares had plagued his son, but was thankful he'd been allowed into James' trust and been told about them, allowed to help the boy through them. Recently though the nightmares had faded, lulling most likely both of them into a false sense of security that they had gone. He supposed all they would ever really need was the right trigger, but it was good to know the haunted boy could have some rest every so often.

'Yeah, thanks for being here for me.' James sighed as he leant into the hold. He may be 15, but he still liked the security his fathers arms gave him, especially after a night like this.

'You never have to thank me. This is standard, I should be thankful you let me in.' Prongs met his eyes.

'You're my father, how could I not let you in?' Harold shook his head.

'I may be your step father, but I'm not your real father.'

'Yes, you are. Blood had absolutely nothing to do with being a father; it's your actions that mean you are. You are my father and nothing will change that, ever!' James shot back forcefully, as though daring Harold to argue back.

'And you're my son.' Harold told him instead, causing James to smile even more than when Harold had asked if he minded him marrying his mother, giving him a new father. Although they had a father son relationship, this was the first time it had been said that James was his son, it was normally step son if James asked directly, which brought to him more happiness than he though possible.

'Thanks Dad, you have no idea how much that means to me.' James choked out, twisting in the embrace so he could hug the older man. His father smiled.

'I think I have an idea son, I think I have an idea.' After a few more moments in silence, they stood up, James feeling a lot less shaky than before the talk. 'You feeling better now?' The younger Potter nodded.

'Thanks Dad, for everything.'

'I could say the same to you. Now off to bed with you, if you or Sirius needs to see me, my sleep is free to interrupt, okay?' James nodded, his eyes shining brightly, he was so lucky to have Harold in his life. 'Good night Jamie.' The older man kissed the top of his head before going back to his own room, James doing the same in the opposite direction. Slipping back into bed, he was relieved to see Sirius still asleep before drifting off again himself.

A loud bang woke James up the next time. Bolting upright once more, he hastily put on his glasses before noticing that he was the only one in the bed. Crawling over the rumpled blankets, he wasn't too surprised to see Sirius sat on the floor, shaking almost as much as he had been the previous night.

'Siri?' James called out softly before getting off the bed and sitting next to his friend, wrapping his arms around the boy in comfort.

'Sorry, didn't mean to wake you.' Sirius mumbled, still trembling, his eyes closed.

'Don't worry about it, I'd rather be awake than have you on your own.' James reassured him.

'I just…I just don't understand why they couldn't accept me for who I am, I'm their son, and they beat me; their own flesh and blood.' Fresh tears began to trickle down his face, but he didn't even try to wipe them away. James gave a sigh.

'I thin that's one of those questions you'll always ask yourself, but never get an answer to Siri.' James was forced to tell him regretfully. Sirius nodded in understanding but James continued as on his opinion. 'I think it could be that they are so caught up in blood politics and creating the perfect heir to continue the name they forgot about you being their son, someone to love. They were brought up like you were with little love and a lot of rules, so when you broke the rules they didn't know what to do.'

'You're defending them!' Sirius looked at him incredulously and in shock.

'No! What they did was wrong in every way and they had absolutely no right to do that to you, but it is a possible reason why they did it, that's all I can offer for an explanation.' The boy told his friend, not surprised at Sirius' reaction, after all, it was what he had done when Harold had had given him an explanation to what had happened to him those years ago.

'But how can you be sure? I mean, you have the perfect life; your parents love you and show it! You've never been beaten or hit by them or anything like that! Neither of your parents are like mine!' Sirius ranted, once again reminding James strongly of himself, they really were more similar than he'd ever thought before.

'My Dad grew up exactly like you did, without any type of love, but he didn't believe in their views and he stuck by it. He and his brother ran away from the house and went to live with my Great-Aunts who had always had a soft spot for them. And as for the perfect life…' James trailed off and moved away slightly from his best friend. He'd never told Sirius any of the things that had occurred before Hogwarts, hoping he could leave them there, in the past, but to help his friend, it may be best if he knew James really did understand what he was going through.

'James?' Sirius looked at him, concerned at where this was going. James got up off the floor and went over to his large bookcase, pulling out a very plain, brown notebook and gently throwing it at Sirius, who caught it easily. 'What is it?'

'Just read it, you'll understand. I'm going to go and start on breakfast, come down when your ready.' The be-speckled boy told him awkwardly as he pulled on an old tee shirt and jeans, planning on having a shower after breakfast. He hurried out of the room, leaving Sirius even more confused.

Opening the notebook, he read the first page, his eye's widening in shock at what he was reading.

_Innocence. A child is supposed to be innocent, the ideal of innocence and perfection. So what happens when that lovely cocoon of blankets the child is wrapped in is torn away shoving them forcefully into the adult world? A word of cruelty and pain, a world that a child's eyes should never see; violence is a common occurrence and people who are supposed to love, supposed to care for you, can't fulfil their roles. What is a child to do when it is those people who are supposed to care for you who are the ones who rip those covers back so cruelly, allowing him to shiver in a world where he can no longer be a child, and yet will never be considered an adult?_

_Father. Is it a title one is awarded? You have had a child and so the name is presented to you or is it something to be earned? Wiping the tears from a child in pain, reassuring a frightened child when the monsters seem to be after them, being his knight in shining armour to hold back the darkness and showing his pride when his child learns a new skill or does something well. Those are the people who've earned the title Father. I have never called Him that. To me, he is Sir, my enemy, the man who causes so much pain, the man who causes so many of those tears a father would wipe away. _

_Can a person really be two so different people? Sir is. Everybody loves Sir, you can hear it in their voices, the pride, the admiration, yet we see the bruises, the tears, and the alcohol._

_My Mum may have once been strong. The hazy memories of when she fought back. She fights no longer. He beat that out her so long ago. Now she smiles sadly, knowing one of these days may be her last, resigned to this hell she is now forced to live in. Mopping up the blood he forced from her, kissing my torn skin and murmuring those soothing words that heal my broken bones. She is my hope, my world, my reason for living. Those nagging thoughts that plague the back of my mind as I'm forced to watch that red essence escape my fragile body, the hope that this time I will not be forced to awaken and peace will take me at last; I must drive them back. She needs me as much as I need her, we will always be there for each other, we have to be, we are all we have. Books can only offer so much comfort and escape._

_We escape as much and as often as we can, but in the end, reality will always win. Always._

Sirius' mouth opened in shock, Harold was always so nice to him, treated him like a son. He couldn't imagine him ever striking anybody even in anger. But James' words rang around in his head: _Can a person really be two so different people? Sir is._ But he said he never called him Father, only Sir, Harold has always been called Dad whenever Sirius was there and he had never ever seen him drinking alcohol.

The mention about books was of little surprise to Sirius, as he had quickly discovered James' loves for the stories. Sirius himself had never been a great reader, but after seeing how engrossed his friend was in them, asked James to read to him. His friend had a way of bringing the story to life, and so Tuesday evenings had begun when all the Marauders would stay in the dorm, and for a few hours James would read to them all, enrapturing them all into another world. Of course the rest of the school thought they were just plotting new pranks, little knowing they had done that in History of Magic earlier that day, and so their secret stayed safe.

What the hell was going on here? Sirius thought to himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author: Cha-Cha**

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the show so please don't sue.**

**Warning: Child abuse, still.**

**A/N: BigTeddy: Thank you for being my first reviewer! I'm glad you like the friendship between them, I have to say there are far too few which is just about their friendship! I hope I updated quickly enough for you!**

**Theo Darkstar: Glad you think so, I was trying to make it different but still focused on the boys. **

**Summerlovin9191: Well,, here is the second, and final, chapter, glad you like the story!**

The door squeaked as it opened, revealing Harold standing in the doorway. Sirius panicked slightly, if he really was the person who had hurt James so much, he certainly didn't want to be alone with him.

'Hello Sirius, how are you feeling this morning?' Sirius gave no answer, and just stared at the man he'd always thought so kindly of. Seeing the book in the boy's hand, Harold gave a sigh, he had a feeling he knew why there was no answer. 'It's not me, just keep reading Sirius, it'll explain everything.' Sirius stared at him; unsure what to think still, his eyes stayed on the man until after James' father had left the room again. He had nothing to loose though by reading on, and so he turned to the next page dreading what he was about to read but at the same time almost curious at Harold's cryptic statement..

_Mum is getting worse. With every blow he lands on her, she weakens. She still smiles but it is becoming harder. She tells me to be strong, but I feel as though as my strength grows, I sap the strength from her. St Mungo's gave her some potions and she seems to be better. Her hands shake though, but she will live, not as long as she would have done, but for a number of years yet. I don't know what I'd do without her. _

_Sir's left her alone after the instructions from Mungo's came; wants to be seen as the doting husband I suppose. No one knows he did it, he killed her. His hands dripping in the years he stole from her, his smile never leaving his face._

_She doesn't heal anymore, her power is too fluctuating. Her brain is hurt so she has less control; she is as I am with my accidental magic. He praises me with friends about my successes of my accidental magic then beats me in private for the pain I cause him as the magic hurts him when he strikes me. I have no control, but it seems to me, neither does he._

Sirius could feel his own hands begin to shake. He had never asked why Anna's hands shook, nor had he mentioned how he did notice that she never used magic, no matter how much covering his friend and James' father tried did, but he had never even begun to suspect this. He turned to the next page, almost not wanting to know what other secrets he was about to find out about the Potter family. They seemed to the world as though they had everything and yet the things he was reading about really struck home at how similar his and James' home lives were.

_Mum killed Sir today._

Sirius stopped; his eyes were glued to the first sentence._ Mum killed Sir today._ Then Anna, the sweet lady who treated him with more kindness then anyone else had shown him, killing a man! Sirius just couldn't believe what he was reading, but after the last few pages, he supposed he shouldn't be that surprised. If her magic was fluctuating, it would be like accidental magic, even if she used her wand. It was probably an accident. He just pushed her too far and her magic took over, trying to protect her. _Mum killed Sir today._ Then if Sir was dead, who was the man James introduced as his father? He carried on reading, hoping there would be a clue.

_She didn't mean to and the judge understood. He tried to hit me in front of her and the magic flowed. Guess she had less control today. He flew into the wall. There was a coat hook. Everyone mourns Him; all but Mum and I. We knew him all too well; the only ones who ever saw the true side of Sir. Uncle Harold didn't mourn either, he put his arms around Mum and she cried. I was scared. Did she want Him back? Did need him? I tried to tell her it was okay, I would look after her, we didn't need him. Mum and Uncle Harold smiled. She said she was relieved, who cries when they're relieved? I didn't understand, not in any of my books did they explain what to do now. What would happen to us?_

Uncle Harold! Sirius' mind raced, Anna had married the brother of her husband, and that was the man James called father? Or was the man downstairs a different Harold? He re read the last sentence and gave a sad smile. It was a sentence very typical of James. The Marauders had quickly caught onto the discovery that some things James just couldn't understand, like these types of emotions and ways of showing it especially if there wasn't a story where something similar had happened. Gradually over the years, this had faded away as they explained things to him the reactions he just couldn't seem to grasp. He supposed he had never had things like that explained to him, while Sirius had made a point of studying people while at the Snob parties, as he liked to call them, he was forced to go to when he was younger. Of course now he was disowned he would never have to go to one of those again. Turning the page once more, he smiled as he read the first line; things could only get better for James now.

_Uncle Harold moved in today. He was Sir's brother. Mum say's she loves him. I don't understand. Mum says she loves me but this is a different type of love, a love between a man and woman, husband and wife. I didn't understand why Mum wanted to start the hurt again, but she told me that wasn't love, whatever love there had been vanished when his fist connected with her face. Is hope he is different, Mum needs someone, I need someone. She shakes even more now, but the Healers tell her it won't get worse, she will survive. And because of that, so will I._

Well, that explained Harold's statement earlier Sirius thought back, but to think, the man James called his father was actually his Uncle; that was just odd! But no matter whom Harold really was; Sirius could easily see that the man truly loved James, and maybe, just maybe he could eventually love Sirius like that, he hoped so anyway.

_Father. Dad. I finally have one. Mum and Dad got married. He was proud of me. He taught me to fly, emotionally and physically. Sent me on my first broomstick and I was flying high in the sky, he never even told me how to do it, it was as though I had been born to fly. When I came down he smiled and hugged me, told me how good and proud he was of me. _

_When I woke up screaming and sweating from my nightmare, he held me tightly, as Mum tried to do before Sir stopped her. He stayed with me all night; I fell asleep in his arms. _

_He tells me stories of far away lands, of friends I will make and how the future is so much brighter. He is my father. Blood doesn't matter, it is deeds not the blood that counts, Merlin knows Sir spilt enough of my blood._

_When I first called him Dad, he asked me not too. He felt he was stealing his brother's child, even if he was violent and unloved by us. I told him he had earned it; I never called Sir by that name, only a person who truly deserved that name would be called by that name. He smiled and stopped arguing. I suppose I will understand in time, and when I have children, I will earn that name, just as I forced my father to, and by father I do not mean Sir. He is Sir and only Sir, my father was Uncle Harold._

_I will hold them when they awaken from nightmares, they will know how proud I am of them and I will give my life to make sure they are safe. He will keep his innocence, a pleasure I was not allowed and he shall be happy, as happy as I am now._

Re reading the page once more, he felt as though he could relate to James' thoughts. To him, Father was always that, Father. He had never been Dad or Daddy or Dada or any of the other names children give their parents, but instead the cold, aloof man who demanded he was to be called Father. The examples James had given may as well have been foreign concepts to him, his Father had never taught him to fly, instead handing him a broomstick and demanding the house elf keep an eye on him to make sure he didn't hurt himself too badly. After his nightmares, he had been told firmly to go back to bed, and if he cried out or protested at all, he was beaten for showing such a weakness unworthy of being a Black. He'd never had anyone who cared for him as Harold did for James; he was almost jealous. Maybe he would have been jealous if he hadn't read what Sir had done to the child; his friend deserved that kind of happiness.

Maybe his mother was right; he was just a blood traitor who would never amount to anything, always fleeing when things got rough, James had survived all that and was still strong, he was incredibly weak compared to James; hell he was just a weak, pathetic, mudblood lover, just as his mother had always told him, not that he approved of the wording; guess she was right after all. The tears that he thought had run out earlier came once again as he curled up into a ball, the notebook fell to the floor, but he didn't even notice, nor when it flipped to the last page.

'Don't ever, EVER say that Siri, that bitch was wrong about everything!' James voice reached his ears before arms once again held him. Sirius hadn't even realised he'd spoken out loud.

'No, she was right, I did just run away when things got rough, you never did though, you stuck through it all.' Sirius mumbled weakly into James' chest.

'I was too young to do anything else; I had no other options except to stay but unlike you I had my Mum with me, she shielded me from some of it and got me through the times; you've had no one like that in your house. Both of your parents were abusing you, and that's what it was, abuse. In my eyes you are strong. You put up with Howler after Howler from them and on top of that been beaten and abused at home, I don't think I would be strong enough to live with that, I would have run long ago.'

'You did have it done to you, but you still stayed; I'm just weak.'

'No, you are not!' James retorted forcefully. 'You are incredibly strong and don't you dare say otherwise. We've both lived through absolute horrors no one should ever have to feel and we made it through. I've had lots of support and help from my family, now it's your turn. You've survived, now you get to heal, like I've been doing. I still get nightmares about what he did to me, but I no longer live waiting for someone else to treat me how he did; and I'm going to be there for you like I have been since that first Howler and how I've wanted to be since you first went home, you always were my strength, someone I wanted to be like.'

'What are you talking about?'

'You always stood up for what you believed in, you didn't give into what your parents wanted and instead found the best things in life instead of focusing on the negative, you showed me how to be my own age and how to live.'

'I always thought that of you. You taught me to laugh and how to have fun, I guess we owe each other a lot more than we realised.' Sirius answered, wiping away the last of his tears before trying to pull away from his friend slightly, only to find James wouldn't let him go.

'I guess we do,' James agreed. 'Did you read the last page?' He asked, spotting where the notebook had fallen open, feeling Sirius shaking his head, James picked the book up and let Sirius go, but still sat close enough to touch, before handing it over, motioning for him to read.

_Tomorrow I will start Hogwarts. I will be a new man. I cannot call myself a boy, I have seen far too much in my 11 years, and still my longing, to be wrapped up in those blankets again, my mother and father protecting me from the cruel world is still there. I have safety and love now, but I cannot forget what has happened, no matter how much I wish I could. I will not let myself be hurt like that again. I will make friends and forget these horrors I have been forced to live. I will have my childhood and I will have fun. The pain will only remind me why this is so important it is to have fun, a concept Dad is teaching me. He loves pranks, a love I can only hope to find in another, a love we can share and spread. Everyone needs happiness in the dark times Mum says is coming._

_Anyway, this will be my last entry. Hogwarts is for new beginnings; and this diary will only remind me of the shadow I have only just emerged from. I have the light now, and in the light I will stay, even if these means fighting for it, and so I must bid you farewell and open my arms to the life I shall embrace with my body and soul. Farewell and welcome._

'I remember that day, the first day we met, on the train.' Sirius reminisced.

'Me too Paddy, me too.' James agreed, casting his mind back with a smile.

_Walking down the corridor, Sirius was only sure of one thing, he had to find a different carriage from his cousins. The only one he could stand was Andromeda but she had left Hogwarts a number of years before Sirius had started. Narcissa, a sixth year, and Bellatrix, a fourth year, however were still there, and he hated them while return they hated him. _

_All of his family were expecting him to be sorted into Slytherin ,as was the Black family tradition, but he wasn't too sure he wanted to go there, Gryffindor sounded a lot better, but he knew there would be hell to pay of that happened, it was nice to dream though. _

_Finally reaching a carriage that only had one person in; a small, be-speckled boy whose raven hair seemed to stick out in random directions he supposed it was better than nowhere since all the other carriages were full._

_Sliding open the door, he saw the boy looking up, he seemed to be about the right age for another first year._

'_Hi, I'm Sirius Black, do you mind if I sit here?' He introduced himself cheerfully, the boy shook his head._

'_As long as you don't mind sitting next to a Potter. I'm James.' The other boy introduced himself. A Potter, interesting. He shrugged his shoulders as he dragged his trunk in, and with James' help managed to get it on the shelf. _

'_Thanks, so, what are you into?' James grinned at this._

'_Quidditch ,I love to fly, what about you?'_

'_Me too, I really want to be a Beater on the team.'_

'_I prefer Chaser, real shame they don't let first years onto the teams.'_

'_What about pranks?' Sirius' eyes lit up._

'_I haven't really been able to pull any. Yet' Sirius answered causing James to grin._

'_I suppose we'll just have to change the yet part, I think we're going to get on fine!' _

'_So do I, so do I.' Sirius agreed, a mischievous smile spreading across his face, while watching his new friend to do the same._

And so from there their friendship had gone; only growing in leaps and bounds when they managed to get into Gryffindor together.

'Why didn't you ever tell us, me?' Sirius asked, not too sure if he was hurt that James had never told him these things, but then again he doubted James knew the true extent of his own home life. James sighed and looked at his hands which were in his lap.

'I just wanted to forget about it. I know in the notebook I said I would remember, but it was hard. I loved Hogwarts, it was so fresh and to bring in all that, it just seemed it would ruin it somehow.' He snorted, 'besides, its hardly something you can slip into a conversation, from hey this Quidditch game is brilliant to guess what, my biological father beat me and my mum for Merlin knows how long until she accidentally killed him and now my father is actually my Uncle. There never really was a good time to bring it up.' Sirius nodded in understanding before a heavy silence came over the room until Sirius finally broke it.

'He'd beaten me and whipped me when I ran. He'd been starving me for a while, then throwing me around and punching me, using curses and hexes I'd never heard of as well as unforgivables, I just…' he trailed off, trying to think of how to put it into words, James didn't interrupt, he could see Sirius needed to get this off his chest. 'I just couldn't do it any more; I couldn't let him do that to me. Everyday was worse than the one before til I finally snapped, I just grabbed everything and ran.'

'You did the right thing,' James reassured him, 'it makes me cold with dread with what they would have done to you if you had stayed. I don't think they would have stopped til you were dead.'

'Me too,' Sirius agreed quietly before leaning against James., placing his head on the younger boys shoulder, the two of them enjoying the silence that surrounded them comfortably, listening only to the rain that continued to beat down on the windows outside.

Eventually going downstairs, as the smell of breakfast rousted them from their room, the two of them walked into the kitchen, both of them now dressed, to see Anna and Harold sitting there, waiting for them.

'How are you feeling you two?' Anna asked as her husband floated the plates over to each of their places on the table.

'A lot better, thank you, mum.' Sirius tried out the word, delighting the Potters. He had been worried they wouldn't want him to use those names, but was instantly reassured by their expressions, even James seemed to be happy about it.

'Glad to hear it son,' Harold finished, causing a surprised, but not unhappy smile from Sirius, who didn't notice the subtle wink Harold gave James. He finally got it! James thought excitedly, Dad's finally accepting blood doesn't matter, the conversation from earlier that morning coming back to him.

'I'm fine too,' James told them as Sirius sat down. James meanwhile went round and hugged each of his parents. 'Thank you for giving me an older brother!' he thanked them enthusiastically, causing joyous laughter to erupt from everyone, including his new brother.

'It was a pleasure Jamie, and I didn't even have to carry him around for nine months either!' Anna joked, allowing the laughter to carry on. Breakfast continued on like this until everything was cleared and Harold had cleaned all of the dishes.

'So what shall we do today?' Sirius asked.

'Quidditch,' was the immediate response from James.

'It's raining though,' Anna told them, the rain was still pouring down and didn't seem to be in any hurry to stop. All the males grinned at this.

'Perfect!' they chorused causing Anna to shake her head in despair.

'Just as long as you apply warming charms and water repellent spells on your and James' glasses. I'll be watching from the dry and warm.' Anna told her husband firmly, who immediately agreed and raced the two boys outside, summoning all their brooms. After realising how old Sirius' broom was, taking into account he was a Beater on the Quidditch team (James was a Chaser), the Potters had made sure to always buy him a broom along with James whenever the new type came out, and kept it in their house to make sure the Blacks couldn't damage it or take it away from Sirius and give it to Regulas, Sirius' younger brother.

Looking out of the window, wrapped up in a blanket she had taken from the end of her bed, Anna watched the men outside laughing and playing around with the snitch and Quaffle's, and laughing even harder as the rain only made the game more difficult, although she was sure there were no rules to whatever it was they were playing. She gave a satisfied sigh as she realised they would heal, and continue to heal; especially now they could heal together.

With times like these, just messing about and having fun in the air and rain, it was easy to forget the horrors of the past, but she knew when they did rear up once again, they could help them through it, together, as a family.

Maybe her sons would tell the other Marauders, as they liked to call themselves; but not yet, neither were ready, but in time they would have healed enough to trust their friends with their pasts, the violence they were subjected to, and let the Marauders heal them even more. But for now, her family were okay, they were alive and loved, and that was what matters the most she decided, as she gave a chuckle as her sons teamed up against her husband, cornering him into giving up the Quaffle he'd caught and chasing him around the large gardens. Enjoying themselves a s a family, a word Anna loved most.

The End


End file.
